Theme 2 - Take 3?

  • Sally Ann
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29 Nov 2013 07:34 #31 by Sally Ann
Replied by Sally Ann on topic Theme 2 - Take 3?
Hi Di,
I am meeting with Ann, Melanie and Simon on Saturday to talk PBs as part of our on-going professional development working together as the Protective Behaviours Training Partnership. Theme 2 - Take 3 is one of the items on the Agenda. Like you, I really want to come to some agreement. Will keep the PBPeople community posted. :cheer:

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29 Nov 2013 08:47 #32 by Ann
Replied by Ann on topic Theme 2 - Take 3?
Looking forward to wrapping up the discussion and reaching resolution.

If we are going to be pedantic (in a good way!) about grammar then I stick with my original pedantic view that the 'anything' can't 'feel awful or small' without thinking...however...if for 'users' of Protective Behaviours it makes sense then it is a goer!

I guess it is about common language usage and I still find myself saying 'What do you feel about that?' on training when actually I am asking on many occasions what people are thinking, not feeling. I correct myself lots when I notice this happening. Of course sometimes I am asking about their feelings and that is fine.

Just like it is common parlance to say 'I'm happy about that' or 'I'm absolutely furious' and not to be too pedantic about pointing out that you are not 'happy' or 'furious', those are feelings not states of being. For me part of the joy of Protective Behaviours training is the opportunity to explore such anomalies of language and be able to point out when it is having a detrimental effect on someone e.g. when 'I am angry' is becoming a belief about who I am (a label) and is thus quite disabling in terms of using thinking to recognise and change feeling and behaviour.

In case I start rambling I shall stop here!
We can talk about anything with someone, even if it feels awful or small :cheer: ;) !

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29 Nov 2013 11:56 #33 by dimar
Replied by dimar on topic Theme 2 - Take 3?
Hi All
Hmmmm Just had a thought.
If we ask 'What do you feel about that' is that asking about thoughts?
If we ask "how do you feel about that' then are we are asking about feelings?
A bit deep and meaningful as I sign off the poota and go to bed.
Cheers and zzzzzzz from Di :lol: This is a yawn :)

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30 Nov 2013 00:13 #34 by Sally Ann
Replied by Sally Ann on topic Theme 2 - Take 3?
Hi Di,

Thanks for adding this into the mix. My intuitive response is to think that both are asking for a feeling response and it is when someone specifically asks 'What do you think about .....' that a cognitive/thinking response is anticipated. The difference between 'What' and 'How' for me is that 'what do you feel about .....?' can have more than one offer in terms of response whereas 'how' suggests perhaps a single response. Will chat more with Ellen about this in her English language devotee role and see what she has to say in terms of linguistics.

There is a poll facility on the forum so we could also see what the popular vote has to say ;)

Best Wishes as ever,
SA

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01 Dec 2013 23:40 #35 by Donna Fortin
Replied by Donna Fortin on topic Theme 2 - Take 3?
The book I was so horrified about has been taken off Amazon due to the wonderful outpouring and petition by parents. The author/parents have been arrested for child abuse.

This could be a good lesson for Amazon. Perhaps they need to look at what they're selling?

Love this forum, and as usual, lots of different feelings...that's why we have evolved so and continue to do so.

Donna Fortin

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02 Dec 2013 00:09 #36 by Sally Ann
Replied by Sally Ann on topic Theme 2 - Take 3?
Fantastic news Donna - power to the people!
Also wanted to let you know the outcome from discussions regarding Theme 2 - Take 3.
'We can talk with someone about anything, even if it feels awful or small', is the version of Theme 2 that we will be promoting from now on. For me this feels consistent with Theme 1 and the people I have been discussing this with during training have also chosen this version,
Thanks again Donna for being on the PBPeople network and sharing ideas and concerns.
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